Sunday, November 7, 2010

Chasing Pavements

There are certain topics I'm scared to broach. Yet ironically, these are the ones I need to think through the most.

So, let me pose this uber broad question. How much is something worth the pain and emotional burden it brings, and when do you need to give up?

I feel like I've been dealing with the same questions for the past six months, and it's gotten nowhere. I'm still in the same crippled emotional state as before. I'm still as confused. I'm still as hurt. A large part of me wants to speak out -- actually, I know I need to. But I'm so afraid of the negative repercussions of expressing myself.

It's difficult to get a good read on the situation when the lines are so blurred. Not only that but when the motivation, logic, and reasoning are all as secret and cryptic as a CIA file, it leads me to feel more cautious about the situation. That's how this vicious cycle has strung me along for as long as it has thus far.

Time and again, I lean on Adele's lyrics to help me voice my pain. Should I give up? Or should I just keep chasing pavements, even if it leads nowhere?

If anyone has any insightful comments or some sage advice, please feel free. I know this post has been pretty vague, but I'd love to hear what someone outside the situation perceives that I can't/don't.

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